Seattle Sounders at Portland Timbers Gameday

Voodoo Doughnuts taste like crap. The overly sugary, kooky confections are a microcosm of Portland: all hype, no quality. Top Pot Doughnuts, however, are just well made donuts. Nothing fancy, flashy or hipster, just artisanal confections done the way doughnuts should be. Seattle may not posture like Portland, but it actually delivers.

I’ve been a Philadelphia Eagles fan since before I could wipe my own butt. In sports, hate and rivalry come easy to me. I hate the Dallas Cowboys. I really the New York Giants. But there is no team I loathe more than the Portland f*cking Timbers. From their pretentious “authenticity”, to their hipster fans, douchebag owner and wannbe city, the Timbers are easily the most insufferable team in MLS. Seattle, on the other hand, has class, boatloads of it. The Sounders can ice this year’s series and win one for all things good in the world.

I know you’re tired, I know you’re injured, but c’mon Seattle, fight and win.

Bold Prediction: Ugh. I wish I could be more positive, but I see Portland scoring first and us equalizing in a seesaw match. The Sounders-Timbers rivalry ends with a perfect bookend: another epic draw in draw city: 2-2.

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